Stress Management

How Do You Learn to Love Yourself? The Key is to Accept Rather Than Blame Yourself

There will always be unsatisfactory moments in life, whether it is work difficulties, relationship problems, or often feeling lonely, these are life experiences that we need to face and overcome. Regardless of whether there is someone by your side, you are always your best comforter and encourager. There is no shortage of online articles and books on the market today that teach people to love themselves. However, it is difficult to realize that you are worthy of being loved. This is often the reason that prevents people from getting over the pain. Here are some thoughts on loving yourself to remind you not to be too harsh on yourself.

Accept yourself and failure unconditionally


To love yourself, you must first be able to show empathy, care and love to yourself, especially in the face of failure. People who know how to love themselves can still patiently adjust their mentality even when faced with pressure; this does not mean suppressing negative emotions such as anger and sadness, but it does not mean that you should severely blame yourself for your shortcomings, and accept your mistakes and weaknesses unconditionally. Traditional Chinese culture values ​​the virtue of humility, but sometimes this trait can accidentally turn into a habit of self-criticism, so you should remind yourself not to devalue your own existence, no matter what you do well or not. (Failure is just a small trough before reaching the top. Maintaining confidence and loving yourself is the way to go! So what if you fail! Build confidence and love yourself in this way)

Loving yourself is not indulgence or self-pity


Some people confuse self-love with indulgence and self-pity, but just like treating children, everyone knows that loving them is to help them grow up healthily, rather than to overindulge or protect them. Therefore, when life is frustrated, people who love themselves will not vent or escape in indulgent ways, or indulge in random thoughts and immerse themselves in their own problems. Instead, they can think differently and relieve their stress in ways that are harmless to themselves and others.

Be true to yourself but don’t ask for perfection


If you want to love yourself, you must have the courage to be your true self, but don’t destroy your interpersonal relationships because you pursue perfection too much. Otherwise, you may become withdrawn and irritable, and you will not be able to tolerate or forgive any mistakes.

Acknowledge the problem and engage in self-talk


To love yourself, you must have the courage to admit that problems exist. If you refuse to admit it, psychological barriers will occur. If you have many unresolved feelings in your heart, after acknowledging its existence, don’t let yourself be immersed in it or blame yourself excessively. Instead, engage in self-talk. The process may not be easy, but as long as you practice it repeatedly and develop a habit, your inner emotions will As you become more stable, you will know how to love yourself better. It doesn’t matter if you can’t find the answer to your problem. You don’t need to insist on explaining all the misfortunes or trying to rationalize your despair, because not every problem has a solution, let alone complicated emotions and feelings, so just find a way to distract yourself. , otherwise the deeper you sink into self-blame, the harder it will be to get out. (Self-talk can also help you understand yourself better! Do you know yourself? Understand your self-image and build confidence)